4.30.2016

Change

Sometimes I fight change.
I clench my fists and have an internal temper tantrum.
The world doesn't know, but my heart does. 


So when it came time to repair the white picket fence that bordered this shade garden overlooking our yard, I had a bit of an internal struggle. 

You see, almost 18 years ago, my husband lovingly cut each picket, painting each one white. He constructed the quaintest of fences to prevent our little ones from walking off this steep drop.
So when the seventeen year old not so little one suggested seeing what it looked like without it,(drill in hand), we may have had a tear or two. Not sadness really, but a bit of mourning for that strange speed tunnel of childhood that whooshed by us, making our hair stand on end and our nerves prickle up.



As the panels came down, we paused and looked at the view. Unobstructed views of the hill and garden and woods beckoned. 





Irises and daffodils became visible from the street and house. I may have smiled at this, thinking of the view I would now have pulling into the driveway or peeking out the living room window.



And suddenly my mourning, my sadness, my hesitation became a celebration of tiny bodies running under sprinklers on hot summer days….of well worn quilts spread with snacks and toys and dirty feet.


Taking down the fence became a rite of passage, a ritual transition of childhood morphing into young adulthood, of parents handing over well worn reigns of promise and hope and trust.


We'll be recycling the worn, but loved fence around my lavender garden.




And somehow I think I will hear whispers of time floating by on the summer wind.


10 comments:

  1. Change is good Monica. It makes life interesting. Looks beautiful there.

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  2. So beautifully said- it gives me courage. What lovely images- thank you for sharing!

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  3. I like how your story illuminates how to accept change. Things are looking Spring-y in your yard! ((hugs)), Teresa :-)

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  4. It's the little things that make you realize how quickly it all whooshes by. When you first moved there you probably envisioned that view without the fence and then it became a fixture. It will be wonderful it its new spot too.

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  5. So lovely, the words and the photos.

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  6. Oh, what a sweet post.

    At my age, I am noticing more and more rites of passage and saying goodbye to things, events, etc. with mixed feelings.

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  7. Change is inevitable. I can't say I always like it, but it comes anyway. A well written post.

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  8. What a wonderful, brave, heart- opening choice you all have made! Love that it was the not-so-little-anymore to suggest it. Change is good, very good. Makes us grow. You will adore your fenced lavender garden. You will be able to hang little lavender wreaths on the fence, too!!! Oh, be still my heart...
    Your poetic writing made me savor each and every image, made me hear your heartbeats.
    xoxo

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  9. It's bittersweet, isn't it? when our little ones grow up and we have to change to go right along with them...we have to grow up in a sense too.....
    I really love your new view...beautiful..
    Love, Mona

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  10. THIS post pretty much sums up how I've been feeling lately. Your way of dealing with it is so good. I needed to read this and be reminded that change is good. I'm glad that you'll still use the fence. It really will be a reminder each time you see it. And those memories that you have...How sweet!!!

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Thanks for chatting!

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